Four Rhythms #02 — The Adventures of Horse Girl

January 18th, 2016

 

…Sarah Jessica Parker? Is that you?

Yes, I did glance at Unhaltable Bahamut Cron Job. Its second episode featured a buttload of angsty flashbacks, a giant titted pink haired girl who snuck into his bed to get groped, and then the big finale was whipping out his dark sword of darkness to use the dark power of darkness to fight the enemy, who is rapily straddling the main heroine while ripping her clothes off, using the dark power of his inner darkness. If you're playing Light Novel Bingo, I think you score a yahtzee with that one. Certainly nothing that amused me as much as…

Impressions:

Oh god, guys. I know you want to pretend to be a totally cool actiony competitive sports thing, but this wasn't an in-between frame. You lingered on this for a good second or two with speedlines. These two images are half a second apart. What kind of nightmarish monster is this? What the hell are you making that horse do!? And this is on top of the very, very sad CGI throughout that entire 'exciting' sequence.

Otherwise, there's not a lot to say about the episode since it was largely like the first. Penis Haver was barely around, so his lack of personality was covered up by his lack of presence, and they went through many of the same motions. Large chunk of completely uneeded exposition about how some things are fast… but some things are strong, minor dumb fanservice, more exposition, more shots of underwear and asses, and ending with an ugly CGI game of not-quidditch that everyone is way too into because everything in Japanese media is your whole life. I think it speaks more to how dreadful UBC's second episode was that I'm heavily leaning towards this than this one's strengths. Most of te characters aren't awful though, and basically writing Penis Haver out of the story when he has no point shows some thought is going into adaptation, which is more than I can say for many things. Still, too many characters do to often be slapped upside the head and told to stop being quite so stupid more often than is comfortable (and would probably count as animal abuse), and it's neither as funny nor as cute as it thinks it is. Some actual structure in episodes would do this wonders instead of simply meandering from start to end.

Next Episode:

Are we paying this artists next week? Neigh!

Posted in Four Rhythms | 5 Comments »

5 Shouts From the Peanut Gallery

  • Paulo27 says:

    Sure hope that purple haired chick doesn’t get much attention.
    This is nothing special but at least it’s trying to stay away from the harem shenanigans that plague these things, a girl which we have only seen twice, and both times she was in her underwear, certainly doesn’t give any confidence to the fact that it’ll at least stay that way. Besides, she looks like the type to be like “you saw me in my underwear, I love you” so that’s not looking up either.

  • The Phantom says:

    This is what happens when you remove porn from a porn movie, this plot alone was not supposed to carry on a show like this.

    Unlike love, election and chocolate, the characters here are atrocious, and there is no chemistry whatsoever between the characters, but above all is NOT fun.

    • Chipp12 says:

      The original game has quite little amount of H content. Even its official site doesn’t have any H pics on the gallery page.

  • LUNI_TUNZ says:

    This “game” makes no sense. Wouldn’t the logical way to compete be to just race to the buoys? And since Pink haired girl only needed ONE point to win the last one, couldn’t she have just rushed to the only other buoy, thus negating the whole “wow, what a super special awesome reversal”?

    • anise_punter says:

      I actually gave this way too much thought (ie, more than three seconds), and the only way this game makes any sense is if once you’re hit in the back your progress is stopped and you have to hit all four buoys again.

      Otherwise once you get down 3 – 0 it doesn’t seem like a comeback should be possible.