Giant Beasts of Ars #01 — Hot Girls in Your Area

January 6th, 2023


Ready to take your (arrow) shaft.

Five down. One to go.


It shouldn't bother me so much, this being fantasy and it only existing for five seconds, but goddamn, that is one red horse. Why is that horse so red? Is it supposed to be a fantasy horse, or do they think that horses are just deep bloody crimson? 

Anyway, this wasn't quite as I expected. Not necessarily better or worse, but definitely… goofier? than the promos had indicated. The music choices are also a bit weird and far more… hard rocking, I guess I'd say? I'm kind of reminded of the opening episode of Rage of Bahamut, but even that was bloodier and more violent, not to mention had far more spectacle and acrobatic horse chase scenes across rooftops. This is relatively muted in comparison… in some ways. After about thirty seconds, I was already ready to strangle the meowing cat girl who had to insert a meow into every single goddamned sentence, and she wouldn't goddamn shut up, which is also how the episode ends, with her meowing happy birthday.

It thankfully spares very little time for any kind of exposition or explanation about the setting or characters, though that also leaves the story feeling a bit directionless for a lot of it. One dude's a drunk and has A Past. Another's a completely mad lunatic addicted to some kind of crystal drug that giant pigs with drills also vacuum down. The girl is magic and The Evil Empire wants her for some reason, presumably something to do with how she incinerates people and summons a giant headless lizard when you shoot her with arrows. Unless the lizard is something unrelated. It's not Shakespeare, but I'm also glad that I didn't have to sit through an entire lecture on the exact workings of magic rock minerology or how incineration is hot.

Next Episode:

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