Dolls’ Frontline #01 — The Sex Doll Uprising

January 7th, 2022


I continue to be impressed by the correct apostraphe placement.


I love how serious this takes itself on every level while just straight up ignoring how absurd and silly everything about the character designs and visuals are. Basically, a bunch of fetish sex dolls shoot each other. It's like if you replaced all the lightsabers in Star Wars with giant dildos and everybody simply ignored it. We don't have the military budget to give our androids pants, but frilly bonnets? You bet your ass. The budget for frilly bonnets, hair ribbons, braids, and garter belts is only second to the materiel budget. But I guess that's what happens when you have infinite bullets.

The silliness also extends to the dialogue and direction. There's exactly one of them that chirps like an excited cheerleader while all the rest are spouting lines like "I AM DEATH BORN OF REVENGE'S VENGEANCE." Most of the time though, it's just reciting logistical babble. There's about a three minute span straight of nothing but that before it suddenly cuts to daytime, they take like one shot and through a single grenade, then declare that everything was a complete success. And then it was not because… uh… the enemies finally started shooting back? That sums up every 'action' scene here really. Whoever was bothering to shoot was winning, and they patiently took turns, first one would shoot and declare themselves winning while the enemy was getting their faces blown off, then they'd trade. I should also note that everybody always announced their surprise attacks somewhere between 30 seconds and three minutes in between springing them, further adding to how corny it was with zero self-awareness of it.

My amusement with things that comes from ridiculous juxtaposition of things that make no sense together rarely lasts more than an episode or two though. On the other hand, it's not like this is a strong season. This was a profoundly dumb episode about overly serious fetish sex dolls without an iota of awareness of how silly the whole thing was. If the budget had been above mediocre, it could have been amusing at least for the popcorn factor, but logistical babble is pretty much all you're getting.


Posted in Dolls' Frontline | 1 Comment »

One Lonely Comment

  • DP says:

    I did have some fun trying to figure out how to justify this premise from a realistic SF view point. The closest I came was “okay, imagine a future world where robots are commonplace gets into a war. They suffer a military disaster and all the purpose-design realistic robots are wiped out, so they urgently insist on conscripting everyone’s sex robots. These robot bodies are then uploaded with combat training programs and sent into the fray….”

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