Project Scard #01 — Dudes in Cafes… Again

January 8th, 2021


Why does GoHands keep making this show over and over?


The good news is that this isn't another stealth sequel to Hand Shakers. At least, probably not. It's always a little hard to tell with GoHands since the writing in their shows may be most accurately described as the fevered dreams of an 18th century madman on two tonnes of elephant-strength LSD, and this doesn't seem to be any exception. Of course, as in all of these things, most of the time is not spent on being bonkers, but on dudes lounging in cafes and million dollar penthouse suites. There's not so much a driving plot element like being framed for murder and hunted that even K had (but mostly ignored), as there are cakes to eat and couches to lay in. At least, until they go into super dynamic over-animated battles where they can declare their devotion to each other, enhanced with excessive saturation filters and awkward CGI. And nothing is more awkward than the photorealistic CGI buildings, vehicles, and SWAT dudes slowly drifting around the background while the camera itself and characters don't move. It's… certainly an aesthetic choice.

If you've seen any of GoHands previous iterations of this kind of thing, K, Hand Shakers, W'z, etc, you probably have a good idea of this one too. The action when it exists is certainly impressive, but it's only a minute or two in an otherwise profoundly boring episode of boring dudes sitting around. You can have an action show without explosions every five seconds, but it's a hard sell that these dudes are fighting for what they believe in, failed to accomplish their goals, etc etc, when they spend 95% of the runtime eating cake and pontificating philosophically about being a hero. It's certainly not the hook of even a show like the Suicide Squad thing last season either.

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