The Abandoned Sacred Beasts #06 — Leopards Eating People’s Faces Party

August 5th, 2019


"I never thought leopards would eat MY face!"


I have questions. How exactly did Cain manage to smuggle an entire zoo of giant murderous monsters anywhere with nobody noticing? What exactly was his plan here by murdering all of his benefactors? If the army already has a squad set up of a couple dozen people capable of killing most of his zoo on their own, how was this going to be the unstoppable force of gods? Did that squad have to practice its sick skater jumps ahead of time? Why exactly was Tits McGee shocked when she saw that Schall was shot some eight hours after seeing that she was shot? What was giant wolf Hank even doing? What were we supposed to take left a divot taken out of the town? Was he dragging his giant apparently 50 ton tail after leaping over everything?

Instead, the questions it answered mostly concerned that one blonde dude that's been hanging around the edge of the show. He's Cain's little brother, and in case you weren't getting enough of it with Fire Force, his squad uses a bunch of flame throwers to jet around and… uh… throw flames at things. You'd think they'd be going with the magic bullets, but nah. Which isn't to say it was all that bad an episode. It's hard to say that it had any real highs, but given the last week of stills, meandering banality, and writing problems far faaar worse than a little nonsense, I feel like this and Granbelm's most recent episode are the bare minimum baseline an action show should aspire to. Cain did prattle on despite just being a fairly boring genocidal megalomaniac whose three powers so far are having a tall hat, grinning maniacally, and arbitrarily regenerating from whatever he feels like. This would have been the time and place for Hank or Little Brother (seriously, does this dude even have a name yet?) to job to him to cement him as Prime Antagonist, not blow him up to demonstrate how unblow up-able he is.

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