Whitest Man in America Rap-off and Premiere Week(s) Wrap Up

July 13th, 2015

Not really that exhausting a new season ‘week’ honestly.

Obligatory disclaimer as always. Shows certainly do get better or worse than what their first episode(s) indicated, which is probably a good thing for this season as it was rife with pretty dull opening episodes that supposedly promise that later ones will be totally different. At least judging from what the rest of the peanut gallery around the internet is saying at any rate, reminding me why I’m a hermit.

Anything I’m going to cover for another week will have carbonara by the link to my original post on it, or if I don’t have an original post, to videos of puppies in slow motion or something. That doesn’t mean I’ll stick with it, or won’t eventually pick up something without one, just that I’m planning to cover at least one more episode. Thursdays and Saturdays are messy looking at the moment, so I’m playing it a little conservatively. Anyway, onward and forward.

The only things left to air are sequels to shows I hated (Cinderella Girls (17th) and Prisma Ilya (24th)), so… noooo… Not sure what the deal with Italian Lupin is at this point. Honestly, stopped paying attention and I cherish my ignorance.

MONDAY

To Love-Ru Fogginess

He trips… and falls into boobs or a crotch! For the eighty seven thousandth time!

Snow White with the Red Hair

World’s most boring and socially defective people staring at plants.

Actually, I’m…

Trying to do a little bit of everything, but the ‘selling’ point is just loudness in place of humor.

Scenery Porn

  

Is nobody going to mention the guy on a chainsaw writing love letters in Portuguese to a 14 year old?

TUESDAY

That’s Voice Acting

The only notable thing was the weird narrator, and that was horrible.

Overlord

In virtual reality made real, we sit in chairs and stare for twenty straight minutes.

Monster Girls

The only jokes are that an attempted rapist is female and she has a cloaca.

WEDNESDAY

Sky Mage Light Novel Adaptation

Is this even a show or just the congealment of a bunch of terrible light novels taken digital form?

The Other Show About Sexual Predators

    

Or that one of Jiyuu’s friends desperately wants to do her father?

Umaru

Trying to turn one bad joke cliche into twenty minutes by the sheer force of repetition.

Gangsta

Moving at a snail’s pace and has a fifth grader’s view of what’s adult.

THURSDAY

 School-Live!

    

If it doesn’t quickly build off the last minute of the first episode instead of the first insipid twenty, I’m straight out.

 Chaos Dragon 

 

Is utterly ridiculous, yet keeps trying to take itself seriously. Also loves to murder children.

 Aquarion Logos 

Understands basic episodic structuring, so doesn’t feel as slow as everything else. Characters and budget still a major problem.

Rampo Mysteries

Let’s all sit in a room and instead of plot developments, have everything explained to us with powerpoint slides.

Aoharu x Machine Gun

All the glare in the world can’t hide the inappropriate melodrama and lack of humor despite auditory comedy stingers.

Castle Town – Dandelion

There was basically a ten minute expositional montage of the entire cast. What is this even trying to be?

FRIDAY

Ushio & Tora

Awesome action consisting of grunting and speedlines, with more yelling to fill the time otherwise.

GATE

In two episodes, I think there have been approximately twenty five minutes of briefings.

Prison School

   

Look at the screencaps and you’ve got most of the humor. And fanservice too. And seen most of the animation.

Classroom Crisis

Another show that consistent almost entirely of watching people at meetings.

 Symphogear GX 

A weaker start than the first two seasons, but they did punch a mountain and suplex a space shuttle.

SATURDAY

Yada Yada The Concept of Dirty Jokes Doesn’t Exist

Animaniacs had better sex jokes than this. And less sitting through meetings.

DRRRRRRRRR

    

And seriously, what the hell was with that fever scene in the first series? Who thought that was a good idea?

 Charlotte 

Already cannon balling into the angst-pool and stripped the protagonist of the personality he temporarily had.

 Working!!! 

Two episodes spent reiterating and rehashing old jokes. Patience is running thin.

 Gatchaman Crowds Insight 

At least be horrifying with your weird assumptions about the internet instead of spinning your wheels for two weeks.

 Braves of Six Flowers 

About five decent minutes of fantasy adventure so far bookending around 35 tedious ones of mostly exposition.

Dragonball No

I can’t wait for the power level to reach maximums.

Sunday

 God Eater

    

A few decent things with the direction, but mostly moving very slowly and a dullard for the protagonist.

Wrapup of the Wrapup:

Meh. Well, still betterish than last season… I guess. At least Symphogear and probably one of the other action shows will keep that end up after the three month drought. I almost certainly won’t be covering three shows on Thursdays, so it’ll probably come down to which one has the most obnoxious next episode, and I already know what Chaos Dragon’s is. Then again, School-Live’s is in the coveted before-work timeslot. Similar goes for Saturday, although it is a weekend and they are all hours apart, so I might be more lenient. If Charlotte and Working have another dull or angst-dump out of nowhere though, they’re probably right out. I can at least rely on the clown in Hajime’s boobs and the show’s (and clown’s) horrifying views on the internet and society in general to… well, be horrifying. But fascinatingly so. Like an evil clown embedded in someone’s chest.

Monday through Wednesday are looking pretty bad though. If Gangster can pick up its pace by about threefold and stop mincing around with talking about how totally adult and deep and dark it is while having super humans do cartwheels through the air and leaving body counts behing them that would make Pinochet blush, maybe I’ll go with that, but since it’s been all talk and (budget-less) execution has been at odds with what it’s saying, I have little hope. Perhaps I’ll do some more game reviews since it’s been a while, although those take a lot longer than the 35 or so minutes I usually take to post about an episode. I guess we’ll see. Avaunt!

Posted in Premiere Wrapup | 11 Comments »

11 Shouts From the Peanut Gallery

  • Dave Baranyi says:

    I’m only following Braves and Gatchaboobs out of the ones that you are continuing with, and I’m not certain that I’ll stick with G-boobs much longer if it doesn’t actually start to do something/anything.

    My predictions are that Lotta-Charlie and Dead-School will bury you with Everest-sized mountains of angst.

    I can only laugh and do the final sign-of-the-cross on you for trying to stick with God Awful.

    Good luck! (We all need it again this season.)

  • kenuran says:

    So it looks like yet another deadzone for Tuesday and Wednesday.

    Actually I’d be kinda sad to see you drop Working after covering it this long. The source material is already finished so this will probably end up being the last anime season it gets.

    The Italian Lupin was recently reported to premiere on August 29th then every week after that.

    http://www.mediaset.it/quimediaset/comunicati/il-nuovo-lupin-iii-infiamma-l-estate-di-rimini-sabato-18-luglio_20764.shtml

    Well anyway, that Justice League: Gods and Monsters thing leaked early. Its basically a alternate universe with the son of Zod as Superman and the Man-Bat as Batman. I guess its supposed to be more morally gray where the League isn’t all super against killing or something like that. Its by Bruce Timm and those DCAU guys. Wanna give it a look since its another anime deadzone?

    Aroduc says:

    I really try for the Western side of things to not post about them until after the official release date for weird moral reasons that I can’t really rationalize or explain.

  • Opulent Rag says:

    Y’know, if you drop any of your picks this season, either due to boredom, disappointment, annoyance, or all three, you can always review western shows again. I’ve seen that Steven Universe and Star vs.tFoE are better than most anime to come out this year.

    Aroduc says:

    I could, I guess. I haven’t really watched much since ‘real’ TV ended a month or whatever ago though.

  • Di Gi Kazune says:

    Your choice of shows is worrysome in that half of what you chose (ie, primarily the Thursdays) are destined to end badly. C’est la vie.

    Aroduc says:

    End badly? They haven’t even started well.

    Di Gi Kazune says:

    That even makes things less encouraging…

  • Anonymous says:

    I did not know what show the “Scenery Porn” was so I clicked it and it takes me to youtube. is that intentional

  • Sporklord says:

    I have decided that Aroduc knows all and I shall follow his recommendations. What could go wrong?

    Aroduc says:

    Everything.