The Game of Champions: “Is It Porn?”

November 2nd, 2007

This is what happens when there’s no shows to cover for a day and my friends abandon me for central New York.

Think you can tell the good from the bad? The porn from the pure? The chaste from the corrupt? The innocent from the immoral? The wholesome from the whores?

Personally, I doubt it, but you’re welcome to try.

25 game openings are contained below. Maybe they’re from a game as clean as a whistle… or maybe they’re as raunchy as your drunk aunt during Mardi Gras. I tried my best to weed out games that had multiple versions, porn and clean, but I may have missed one. If you point it out, you can have that one for free. You’ll probably need it. There’s one or two gimmies in there, but you’ll have to work for the rest. For all you know, I threw in a PS2 board game just to screw with your minds. Hell, maybe they’re all PS2 boardgames.

And yes, I’m aware that it’s easy to cheat, but then I’ll make fun of you and your dog. You may have to refresh as youTube overloads the buffering of browsers and you’ll lose the sound at some point depending on your audio card.

If you know what to look for, it shouldn’t be that hard. I’ll post the answers tomorrow.

Oh, and if you said the title picture above was from a porn game, you’d be wrong. It’s from Broccoli’s Cross World. There’s your baseline. Good luck.

Entry #1
Sword Surfers and Witches

Entry #2
The Deep Blue Yonder

Entry #3
Sketch-Con 5?

Entry #4
Wasn’t This on Mythbusters?

Entry #5
Bad Spanish

Entry #6
Keep Out!

Entry #7
Less Operatic Than You’d Expect

Entry #8
Warring State Era

Entry #9
I Question Their Math

Entry #10
Sounds Like a Bad Sitcom

Entry #11
More Cherry Blossoms! More!

Entry #12
Sad Girls With Violins

Entry #13
Tiny Smashers

Entry #14
Is That the Title or the Whole Plot?

Entry #15
More Lightweight Fantasy, How Creative!

Entry #16
A Melodic Downpour

Entry #17
Executable

Entry #18
Oh Ho… Something Not Japanese

Entry #19
More Lens Flare!

Entry #20
They Love Their Clouds

Entry #21
What Does That Even Mean?

Entry #22
Rock Me, Amadeus

Entry #23
That’s Gotta Hurt

Entry #24
Pirates!

Entry #25
ALART!

Posted in Games | 9 Comments »

9 Shouts From the Peanut Gallery

  • AGear_to_Ax says:
    November 2, 2007 at 8:53 pm

    Too many videos…

  • selkirk says:
    November 2, 2007 at 9:38 pm

    So without cheating, or looking at titles…
    #2 – Forgot the title, but it’s Kogado, so no
    #8 – Sengoku Rance. Obviously porn
    #9 – Edelweiss? – Yep
    #13 – Little Busters – Nope
    #16 – Symphonic Rain – Kogado, nope.
    #25 – Jyoukyou Kaishi! – Again, Kogado, so no

    #18 and #22 are dead.

  • Aroduc says:
    November 2, 2007 at 10:03 pm

    18 works fine for me, 22 fixed. Sorry. You know your Kogado though. That’s one of the big tells. ^^

  • serenade_beta says:
    November 3, 2007 at 2:36 am

    #19 – Natsuiro no Sunadokei (AKA Hourglass of Summer) – Clean

  • meganeshounen says:
    November 3, 2007 at 6:00 am

    #4 is from BlackCyc.. and I don’t recall any of their games being less than dark. Is that MinDead BlooD?

  • Pr0nimax says:
    November 3, 2007 at 11:36 am

    #1 is from e.go so Pr0n
    #2 is Tristia of the Blue Sea or something like that. Kogado so all Kogado are clean
    #7 is Phantom of Inferno, Nitroplus – pr0n but it’s the playstation version sooooooo… clean
    #13 needs no keyless introduction
    #14 is a Giga show so… likely H or was Giga the clean one
    #15 is Magus tale and look like a classical H op
    #17 is H whatever the title is because I recognise Ibuki’s VA
    #24 is Kuutei Senki – H game opening.

  • Hemisphere says:
    November 4, 2007 at 7:03 pm

    I see Primitive Link!

  • Zeroblade says:
    November 7, 2007 at 7:39 am

    My internet sucks, so the only one that loaded was #2, and that’s Tristia of the Deep Blue Sea, and I know damn well that ain’t porn.

  • Aroduc says:
    November 7, 2007 at 7:42 am

    Actually, it’s not Tristia. :-P

    Sorry for not putting up the answers. I’ve been busy and haven’t had time to double check my links and whatnot. It’s (theoretically) split right down the middle though, so if you couldn’t find at least 10 non-porn games, then you’re short a few. I promise I’ll have it up along with links to all the sites by the end of Thursday.