Idolatry Is Still a Sin, Damn It

Phantom of the Idol
https://kami-kuzu.com/
Studio: Studio Gokumi
Genre: Comedy
Premieres July 1st

Show Premise: 
Lazy boy band dude is possessed by idol ghost girl.

Random Thoughts:
I prefer the original Japanese title, which is something more like "Divine Garbage Idol". Anyway, I have to note that the boy band is called ZINGS, but why will become relevant a little lower on the page. The promos are painful screaming amidst the usual idol fellating schlock. And obviously when it comes to showing actual performances, it's using that godawful janky CGI that's barely a step up from Miku Miku Dance's 2008 technology. Mostly though, it's just yelling, speedlines to show how loud their yelling is, and shots of fans cheering for idols. Also, is there even really that much cross-over between the boy band and pop idol fanbase?

Preseason Swing Rating: 
        
Oh no. A ghost.

Shoot! Goal to the Future
https://shoot-anime.com/
Studio: EMT Squared
Genre: Drama
Premieres July 2nd

Show Premise: 
Dudes play soccer.

Random Thoughts:
Technically a sequel, but it's to a series from 1993, so that gets it a pass, though I'm not even sure what the connection is. It's the same school and also soccer, I guess, and since nobody has surprise amnesia or is secretly a robot, trying to cash in on nearly 30 year old nostalgia may be all the hook that it has. It appears to trying to be the world's most cliche sports show too. A dude is the awesomest ace and the local team is in decline, and meets the bestest guy who's not interested in soccer but really is. Even tries to go faux stylish instead of really animating playing soccer. Sports shows!

Preseason Swing Rating: 

The day of a hula anime fast approaches.

Summit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
https://teppen-anime.com/
Studio: Drive
Genre: Comedy
Premieres July 2nd

Show Premise: 
Girls are comics.

Random Thoughts:
Weirdly, the manga source only has three exclamation points. Guess they felt they needed more to stand out. Nor is it to be confused with the manga that has only one exclamation point, which is about a transexual idol. God, we're three paragraphs in and still trying to get past the title's punctuation. As for this manga, I would say that it's the usual "girls making faces," but having thumbed through the first couple chapters, it's primarily girls making this face ( ° o ° ), which you can already see plenty of at the side. The promos make it clear that it's not going to be taking a more surreal direction like Joshiraku either, but will have half a dozen squads of girls. So… basically just an idol show in light disguise.

Preseason Swing Rating: 

Now that's comedy.

Extreme Hearts
https://exhearts.com/
Studio: Seven Arcs
Genre: Drama?
Premieres July 9th

Show Premise: 
Girls do super powered sports and are idols.

Random Thoughts:
Remember when I liked you, Seven Arcs? This is even created by the same guy who decided Nanoha would work better with giant beam cannons than pornography of 12 year olds. Then he went and made Dog Days, which was, charitably speaking, a massive mess. Now we have this (technically) original series, from him. Not a show about a particular sport where they're idols on the side, a show about all the sports, where they have laser equipment that turns balls into beams. Which I'll remind you is just how sports shows normally are anyway, but these are literal. And also, they're idols. Is that a big enough change? Has Seven Arcs found its animation talent again? I seriously doubt it.

Preseason Swing Rating: 

Participation trophy at best.

Shine Post – Hey, Did You Know? To Make Me the Ultimate Idol, There's Ordinary, Common, Extraordinary Magic
https://anime.shinepost.jp/
Studio: Studio Kai
Genre: Drama
Premieres July 12th

Show Premise: 
Girls are idols.

Random Thoughts:
Another Love Live/Im@s wannabe franchise, complete with game, manga, and light novel with godawful title, which I needed to use since it is the first piece of this stupid thing that existed. And here, the girl group is called TINGS. That's right, there's two completely unrelated idol shows this season, one with a group called ZINGS, one with a group called TINGS. That's weird, right? I'm not crazy here. In any case, it's also an idol show. In the game version, the manager might have a magical power or something? I don't know, and he doesn't seem to be in the adaptation anyway. I will say that the promo was unsettlingly over-animated, but I doubt extra bouncy hair and upping the FPS are the secret sauce to getting me into an idol show. 

Preseason Swing Rating: 

It's also weird that there hasn't been a real demon idol show yet for that matter.

Magical Teenagers With Very Silly Weapons

Engage Kiss
https://engage-kiss.com/
Studio: A-1 Pictures
Genre: Action
Premieres July 2nd

Show Premise: 
Dude and his girlfriend(s) fight demons.

Random Thoughts:
This be an original, for a certain definition of original at any rate, being the same kind of pre-air gacha ad as Takt.op, since shows about a dude with a magical fighting harem who powers them through kissing? Buddy, that was the norm through the whole magical girlfriend era, and you can't have a fight in a VN without some kind of ritualistic spit sharing. Which is appropriate because the dude writing it is someone who worked at Giga during their Duel Savior era, though is more known for his maudlin melodramas like White Album and Saekano. The promos are action packed and slick though, the dude does write at least visual novels well, and fanservice fighting is of course my bag, along with what seems like a debonair gunslinging protagonist. Please don't flub this, A-1.

Preseason Swing Rating: 
  
Delicious comfort food, but probably awful for you.

RWBY – Ice Queendom
https://anime.team-rwby-project.jp/
Studio: Shaft
Genre: Action
Premieres July 3rd (Episodes 1-3 pre-aired on June 24)

Show Premise: 
Girls fight things.

Random Thoughts:
I already posted impressions on the first three episodes, but to sum up, they were a mixed bag. The animation was quite excellent, but the story and characters were far less impressive, and then the third episode was a bit of a total fiasco of hastily introduced and then resolved plot threads, skipped fights, and trying to pretend like characters had changed in some way by having them suddenly spin in place. I'm not all that familiar with the original though, so I can't say how an existing fan would have taken it. Aside from marveling at some of the fight clips though, I wasn't all that engaged by it.

Preseason Swing Rating: 

Helpfully color coded for convenience.

Bucchigire! Shine Brightest
https://www.bucchigire.com/
Studio: Geno Studio
Genre: Action
Premieres July 8th

Show Premise: 
Magic ne'er do wells have to replace the murdered Shinsengumi.

Random Thoughts:
Also known as "Shine On! Bakumatsu Boys" for reasons I don't fully understand. Another original, so not much to go on but the promos, which are definitely action focused and don't do too poor a job at it, but also veering quite heavily into the Wants To Be Like Jump category, which means lots of yelling, posing, more yelling, and 'humorous' over-reactions by yelling. Can't be a teenage male who cares about anything without screaming about everything happening around you, apparently. You have lightsabers, just run with that. Not much to glean from the staff either, though Geno is still searching for… well, any kind of success at all. I'm doubtful knockoff Jump is it though.

Preseason Swing Rating: 

Emperor Babar will not stand for this.

Samidare of the Stars
https://hoshinosamidare.jp/
Studio: NAZ
Genre: Action
Premieres July 8th

Show Premise: 
Dude is recruited by a lizard into a fight over a magical hammer to destroy the world.

Random Thoughts:
Also known in English as "Lucifer and the Biscuit Hammer." I understand the manga is pretty well regarded, but man, the promos were not promising in the least. Speedlines, speedlines, stills, and speedlines. Which is par for the course for NAZ (Dendrogram, Id: Invaded, etc), but probably not what fans would want to see. The rest seems pretty generic. Team of animal themed people with powers fighting golems… and then other people. Not quite Proust. Presumably some Extra Dramatic things happen that give it its reputation, but if that's the animation they're bringing, it's probably better to just stick to the original.

Preseason Swing Rating: 

Here comes the bellyflop.

Social Engineering in the Post Apocalypse

Lycoris Recoil
https://lycoris-recoil.com/
Studio: A-1 Pictures
Genre: Action?
Premieres July 2nd

Show Premise: 
Girls work at a café and use guns.

Random Thoughts:
Another original, and the promos for this are a trip. The first one is just happy girls being friends, then a couple whip out pistols at the end. The next few are all character focused and could not possibly be more banal. Hell, one is all about how the attractive twenty something who gets drunk every night is too outgoing to find a boyfriend. Then the most recent promo throws all that in the bin and is like "Here in Neo Tokyo, it's the job of secret gestapo teenage assassins to keep the peace and enforce the government's will" while they're all doing drive bys through exploded buildings. I… assume we're doing sort of a Princess Principal or Release the Spyce thing then? Staff's weird too. First time this director's been in charge, but he's an old hat of SAO and Working, and apparently created by the guy who did Ben-To. If we're genuinely going girls with guns though, let's roll.

Preseason Swing Rating: 
    
Who are they even shooting at? Robots?

You0 Deco
https://yureideco.com/
Studio: Science Saru
Genre: Drama
Premieres July 3rd

Show Premise: 
Cyber city is run by social credits and amassing Love. Girl joins the Ghost Detective club of social outcasts who lack Love.

Random Thoughts:
The title is a pun for yuurei (ghost) and you-0 (0 = rei), but it's officially Romanized as You0. Yet another original with promos that I find as difficult to parse as the premise, though that's more on Science Saru (Eizokuten, Devil Man Crybaby) and their trippy visuals than anything else. It's certainly artistic. It's being written by the same dude who did Eureka Seven, but more recently Listeners, which is a bit less well regarded. Your guess is honestly as good as mine. I'd be lying if I said I could make heads or tails of any of it.

Preseason Swing Rating: 
 
Inexplicable horrors can rave too.

Fuuto PI
https://www.kamen-rider-official.com/fuuto/
Studio: Studio Kai
Genre: Action
Premieres August 8th

Show Premise: 
Dudes are detectives and also Kamen Rider.

Random Thoughts:
This is also technically a sequel to Kamen Rider W and its spinoffs, but I don't want to do a deep dive into Kamen Rider lore, nor could I anyway. The main characters do a little Wonder Twins fusion dance to become Kamen Rider, and there's also other dudes who are also other Kamen Riders. They Kamen Ride. It'd be nice if it lived up to the standard set by its tokusatsu brother Vanishing Line, but the promo for it is barely animated and contains zero Kamen Riding. Studio Kai definitely put all their effort into the idol show. 

Preseason Swing Rating: 

At least they don't transform into Bucky O'Hare.

Frilly Magical Girls Being Decidedly Nonmagical

Prima Doll
https://primadoll.jp/
Studio: Bibury Animation
Genre: Drama
Premieres July 3rd

Show Premise: 
Robot girls work at a café.

Random Thoughts:
This is a very weird Key multimedia franchise from after they decided that they didn't want to make full visual novels any more and just wanted to do short stories. Instead of being a five hour faux VN like most of those, this was a collection of short stories posted to their site with a tie-in for figurines. It's essentially the same as Violet Evergarden, but cutsied up about 3,000%. Supposedly they're robot weapon girls, but everything is just frilly maids, smiling, and doing their best. Japan, you know we can and do get that everywhere, right? It's only fun if the weapons of mass destruction actually destruct things, not be angsty about it, and this doesn't even seem to have that.

Preseason Swing Rating: 

As technologically developed as a virtual pet.

Tokyo Mew Mew New 
https://tokyo-mew-mew.com/
Studio: Yumeta Company
Genre: Why
Premieres July 5th

Show Premise: 
Girls merge with animals to fight evil.

Random Thoughts:
It's been almost 20 years since the previous Mew Mew, so I guess it can get past the sequel rule, particularly since it has gone in some weird directions in the interim, like trying an all male version. That said, the promos make this look very much like Generic Cheap Ass Magic Girl Show, and not the PreCure kind where it'll show up in some sakuga clips show once a month because the animators decided to go extra hard when the magical girls had to fight an anthropomorphic piggy bank that made girls sad about not having ice cream money. Yumeta (Cue!, Re:Stage, etc) is almost always terrible anyway.

Preseason Swing Rating: 
   
At least do fun cats.

Smile of the Arsnotoria
https://www.arsnotoria-anime.com/
Studio: Lidenfilms
Genre: Action?
Premieres July 6th

Show Premise: 
Girls go to magic school.

Random Thoughts:
This comes from some gacha where it's the fun kind of magic school where they fight against Tuxedo Mask wannabes. Absolutely none of that is in any promos for the anime, choosing instead to emphasize how they'll be learning to drink tea and be refined, proper ladies for their husbands. Lidenfilms has surprised on occasion (eg Seven Knights), but they're usually pretty poor (eg Build Divide), and this doesn't seem concerned with advertising anything but "has girls." Also tea. 

Preseason Swing Rating: 
  
And look how brightly colored it is.

Cheat Power Harem in an RPG World: Pt 7,238,139,253

My Life in Another World as a Reincarnated Sage – I Gained a Second Character Class and Became the Strongest in the World
https://tenseikenja.com/
Studio: Revoroot
Genre: Paining Me
Premieres July 4th (One hour premiere)

Show Premise: 
See title.

Random Thoughts:
But wait, it somehow gets worse. You know how these godawful things love to grind on slimes? Well, that's how he gains his second class, by absorbing infinite knowledge through *mumble mumble* slime magic. Boy, Dragon Quest really has its fangs sunk deep into your depictions of fantasy, doesn't it, Japan? Hell, this studio has made three full TV series, and two… TWO of them are about getting reincarnated with cheat powers via slimes. The promos are decently animated and action packed, but also feature his status screen and the obligatory demihuman totally-not-slaves harem. The action is also more of the dramatic posing against explosions and beams instead of, say, Engage Kiss's cleaving swarms of monsters through very dangerous ballet.

Preseason Swing Rating: 

My slime got all Shrek'ed.

Vermeil in Gold – A Desperate Wizard Barges into Another World Next to The Ultimate Disaster
https://vermeilingold.jp/
Studio: Staple Entertainment
Genre: Action
Premieres July 5th

Show Premise: 
See title.

Random Thoughts:
Coming to us from a studio that has previously only made porn, it's… also porn. It's the cliche fanservicey summoned magical girlfriend thing where the twist on the formula is that the girlfriend is Mrs. Robinson, or a cougar, or a milf, or whatever it is the kids call them these days. Most of the promos are her being naked with her nipples strategicaly covered up, her draped over him like a mink while he moans, her undressing, or the teenage female shrieking about it. Who knows. Maybe it'll be a quaint throwback to the magical girlfriend era, but I feel like there's quite a few of those this season that don't seem nearly as trashy, which is a feat. 

Preseason Swing Rating: 

Great big stonking flopping orbs.

A Harem in Another World's Dungeon
https://isekai-harem.com/
Studio: Passione
Genre: Paining Me
Premieres July 6th

Show Premise: 
See title.

Random Thoughts:
Again, but wait, it gets worse. This is one of those settings where beast girls are all slaves, and the protagonist runs around buying and/or 'earning' slaves. It is literally a harem of slave wives. And his power? He can open up a magical menu to see the status screen of anybody, and change his character class at will, so his power is literally "has all powers." I am so past ready for this trend to be over and done with, and yet, it seems to show no signs of stopping. The promo for this is barely animated, but makes sure to highlight that there's a giant chested maid. Can we at least find a new fetish? How about cowboy outfits? That feels like neglected territory. Go make a good Grenadier, Japan. 

Preseason Swing Rating: 

Son, we're worried about how you're spending your time.

Uncle from Another World
https://isekaiojisan.com/
Studio: Atelier Pontdarc
Genre: Comedy
Premieres July 6th

Show Premise: 
Dude's uncle wakes from a coma able to use magic. Moves in with his nephew to become a Youtuber.

Random Thoughts:
This is intended to be a parody, though like many of these so-called parodies, it's not so much a satirization of the nonsense as it is just… doing the nonsense, but somebody screams in over-reaction. We've had extra cautious, we've had wears bear pajamas, we've had about fifty different flat out idiots, so is being middle-aged going to be that much of a twist on the formula? How much more blood is there to squeeze from this stone? The promos seem to try to be hewing the line between jokey and extra melodramatic, with particularly half-assed animation. Enough of these shows already. 

Preseason Swing Rating: 

Here's a map. Find a new premise already.

The Dark Summoner
https://kuronoshokanshi.com/
Studio: Satelight
Genre: Adventure
Premieres July 9th

Show Premise: 
Dude wakes up in a fantasy with cheat powers, amnesia, and the goddess of reincarnation as his slave wife.

Random Thoughts:
And immediately buys a slave elf, soon to be followed by a slave demon lord wife, etc etc. Of course he does. That's all this garbage ever does. And would you be surprised if I told you the promos had him looking at his status screen and yelling about how nonsensical it is? The promos are also pretty poorly animated with basically zero action or humor (well, yelling), and not even any real T&A to speak of. Satelight is usually decent for at least first impressions, but this looks quite atrocious, even for its… *waves arms broadly* everything, and it's up against multiple other things of its exact ilk. Good god, anime industry. Come on.

Preseason Swing Rating: 

Crocodile wizard disapproves of humanoid chattel.

Pharmacist in Another World
https://isekai-yakkyoku.jp/
Studio: Diomedea
Genre: Drama
Premieres July 10th

Show Premise: 
Dude gets reincarnated and given cheat powers. Becomes pharmacist.

Random Thoughts:
What is with this garbage and pharamacists? This is the fourth or fifth of these. Why not carpenters? Or blacksmiths? Or haberdashers? Aren't we overdue for cheat power haberdashery? At least that would give us all the joy of getting to say haberdashery, and that's not nothing. He is of course nobility, so he gets to hang out with all the princesses and has a totally-not-a-slave slave maid. Anyway, he has power over the elements, magical diagnosis eyes, and can manipulate genes. Eat your heart out, Doogie Howser, with your just… knowing things.

Preseason Swing Rating: 

Other world slave harem cheat power locksmith.

Awkward Boy Meets Awkward Girl, Screams Ensue

My Stepmother's Daughter is My Ex-Girlfriend
https://tsurekano-anime.com/
Studio: Project No.9
Genre: Comedy
Premieres July 6th

Show Premise: 
See title.

Random Thoughts:
I've mentioned this before, but this premise is always so weird to me. You had no idea your parents were dating, and then got married in secret without a wedding, which your teenage children weren't invited to, and then surprised them over the weekend by moving in. Forget the Brady Bunch nonsense. How do you keep like four different major life changes a complete secret like that from the people you're living with? Anyway, this one's schtick is apparently that it keeps teasing couples asking each other out, or having 'dated' in elementary school, but now it wants to pretend to be coy about will they or won't they. The promos are mainly teasing fanservice. Oh no, here I am in just a towel and you've tripped on top of me. Now, won't some boy roll up my stocking? Yeah, I can see the comedy already.

Preseason Swing Rating: 

I prefer my relationships between polyamorous nonexclusionary apes.

When Will Ayumu Make His Move
https://soreayu.com/
Studio: Silver Link
Genre: Comedy
Premieres July 7th

Show Premise: 
Dude joins shogi club and vows to beat his crush at it before asking her out.

Random Thoughts:
This is essentially a gender swapped Teasing Takagi kind of deal, where a stonefaced dude constantly hits on a girl, but always stops short of asking her out. The jokes are that he flirts with her, she blushes, gets flustered, and thinks to herself "Gee, maybe I do like him." Wash, rinse, repeat over and over and over and over. The promo really sums the formula up. "You're cute." "BWAAAGH! OMG! (DOES HE REALLY MEAN THAT!?!?!?!?)" I really think we're hitting bedrock here, Japanese media industry, and there's no more comedy or relationship in this vein to mine. Not that I can say that we've been coming up with winners either though.

Preseason Swing Rating: 

Give her crabs, and then we'll have a comedy.

Call of the Night
https://yofukashi-no-uta.com/
Studio: Lidenfilms
Genre: Drama
Premieres July 7th

Show Premise: 
Dude with insomnia wants to fall in love with a vampire girl but is too much of a putz.

Random Thoughts:
It's one of those things where the girl is constantly stripping to half naked, the blood sucking is massively sexualized, and the dude is like "Gee, this half naked girl is wrapped around me like a python, how curious" while she blushes and stammers over saying the word "romance." I'm not sucking your blood because I like you or a-a-anything. Now, let's have a super close up of dripping… fangs. It's not much of a comedy, and you can't do much with a character who is nigh indistinguishable from a sack of corn, in both personality and clothing choice. But yeah, there is a half-naked girl.

Preseason Swing Rating: 

I'mma shiv ya, bruv.

The Don's Daughter and Her Babysitter
https://kumichomusume.com/
Studio: feel
Genre: Comedy
Premieres July 7th

Show Premise: 
Yakuza dude is assigned to babysit his boss's daughter.

Random Thoughts:
Also known in English as "The Yakuza's Guide to Babysitting," which is weirdly, more on the nose than the original Japanese. It's not actually much in the way of comedy. Something will happen, somebody will make a scary face and go "ZOMG, HE'S YAKUZA" and… that's about it. Like they go to win a prize at a carnival, menace the huckster, and the joke is yay organized crime. Or he tells her to play hide and seek, then when she covers her eyes, beats up the dudes tailing them. Mostly though, she's insecure, and he tells her to believe in herself, then the metaphorical emotional sitcom music plays. 

Preseason Swing Rating: 
   
Definitely doesn't have rabies though.

The Newly Hired Maid is Up to Something
https://maid-ga-ayashii.com/
Studio: Silver Link
Genre: T&A
Premieres July 23rd

Show Premise: 
See title.

Random Thoughts:
Every bit begins with the declaration that she's up to something, has the kid yell "doing X must mean you're up to something," so she boobs up to his face and says "Yes, because I like you," he gets flustered and yells "Oh yeah, well, y-you're pretty!" so she gets flustered and boobs away. It has its approximately six page formula, and boy, does it stick to it. Frankly, I'm just happy that we seem to have made it out of the dalliance with 35 year old men taking in teenage runaways. And right back to unadulterated maid fanservice, always evergreen, even since the days of Mahoro.

Preseason Swing Rating: 

Now do it with a yeti.