Bye Bye Earth #05 — Historical Reenactments

August 9th, 2024

 

Why are we even bothering the cave witch again?

Impressions:

At this point, I'm not watching the show out of any kind of enjoyment, but as a sort of mental exercise to see if I can actually follow an iota of what the hell is going on. Okay, so the marching band does its… marching band thing, gets ambushed by a single giant spider and the person that they're looking for and is completely obliterated. Belle, who knows nothing at all about mermaids despite, you know, them being everywhere apparently, learns some fun facts about mermaid mating practices and helps mercy kill an undead husband before joining with the slaver dude from a couple episodes ago to form a secondary pseudo band to fight this cave witch who has been… *checks episode* using her undead powers to engage in historical reenactments in the privacy of her cave. Oh, and she went insane because she's also a mermaid and Adonis is the one who delivered the message about her lover dying, so she swore a blood oath of revenge against him. Also, Adonis's dad is just kind of… there, for no real reason.

Was this written by a crazy person? Well, obviously yes, but exactly how much ketamine and LSD did they put in their muffins when they came up with this script? Can we just look at Adonis alone? He's originally presented as some wayward pathetic street dude being picked on and beaten up by the local bullies, but actually, he's 'secretly' a famous archmage with a luxury apartment and personal connections to all the local warlords and cave witches. Why are we even forming bands? Who cares who's the pianist? This is your plan? Not to sneak up on her, but to say "I'll be the flautist" and then yell loudly? I'm definitely not on enough drugs for this show, though I fear for anybody who is.

     

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