That’s Why I Can’t Have Sex #05 — Bestiality and Oral Fixations

August 2nd, 2012

 

Seriously. What the hell is with 2012, Japan, and horses?

Impressions:

Sigh. Yeah, they had to go ahead and make this close after all. The show may have actually trumped the vapidness of bra shopping by doing the exact same thing as the past four episodes, but… wait for the twist… wait for it… let’s use oodles and oodles and oodles and oodles of recycled clips! And instead of Lis exploding with magical power at the end of the episode against CG grunt of the week, Doofus does! What a change! I was worried for a second that generic unnamed CG tentacles would triumph too. Also, ridiculous glasses. I can’t wait to see who’s going to explode with magic power and suddenly one-shot the monster that had them completely beat next. I guess it was supposed to be ‘training’ to focus his ability to get a deus ex erection, but the only way you could tell that is because a quarter of the episode is spent staring at him from a distance while the other characters explain it. 

I guess it still wasn’t as dumb as bra shopping though. What really intrigues me this episode is Q. At the beginning of the episode, she managed to swallow her entire popsicle off-screen in under about three seconds. For starters, she’d have to deep throat it, and that’s not even accounting for the cold. Do these breast creatures just not get ice cream headaches? Also, for some reason, Q imagines him in his ultimate super manly form as a centaur, which is so arousing to her that she orgasms herself to unconsciousness at the mere thought of it. That… actually kind of helps to explain the popsicle thing… in a number of disturbing ways.

Preview:

What? Done with CG tentacles already?

Posted in No Sex | 2 Comments »

2 Shouts From the Peanut Gallery

  • TMH says:
    August 2, 2012 at 10:22 pm

    “deus ex erection…” I probably shouldn’t have laughed at that, but I did.

  • DE-KLAC_CADE says:
    August 3, 2012 at 7:11 pm

    this ep

    mina & quele talking about ryosuke & his powers & etc while popsicle time.
    then quele take a walk see ryosuke in her glasses scouter while lisara in battle.
    next day quele see ryosuke in focus reading mode while mina explain it training.
    lisara still in search but no while quele get more hmm on ryosuke’s training
    to point of sneak in while ryosuke in sleep talking?!
    ryosuke & lisara got little complain then here come another monster.
    lisara in trouble then ryosuke to rescue which show all his training.
    cause now more ero level over 9000 with quele now like ryosuke.
    seem doing well just monster is a water type & lisara is fire type.
    then more oh no then ryosuke tried charge more then choked attack.
    almost yikes till ryosuke pull a sword out of his heart to slay the beast.
    while someone is watching all this with some interest on it.
    monster defeat with quele now want ryosuke indeed he growing a harem.

    to be continued…