天下制覇

"Hey baby, want a taste of my Ignitor?"

Impressions:

Let’s see if I have the opening sequence right. Tomo is entwined with Nia, both grunting and straining, the golden sausage king actually holds an Asura machine plug-in which appears to be a giant dildo inside its bulging protrusion, and the dildo is magnetically attracted to Takatsuki’s breasts.

Really, 7Arcs?

You’re going to club Takatsuki with a dildo and then attack her with tentacles in the same episode?

Really?

This episode also indirectly taught me that Hawaii has had kings named Kamehameha. I was getting ready to make fun of what I thought was just random Dragonball silliness in the background, but lo and behold… SURPRISE EDUCATION. Apparently I need to brush up on my Hawaiian monarchy.

While things did move forward, but as expected, this still doesn’t feel like next week’s going to be the last episode. Kanade’s now suffering from the same thing as Nia’s sister (but nobody else knows about it), or at the very least, leaking magical juices… which may or may not be the Asura Cryin’ version of the female menstrual cycle. The dildo is also an "Ignitor," but nobody has any clue what it actually is, aside from knowing that Kagakagari wants it. I’m so glad that we have a magical widget that nobody understands introduced through the bulging crotch of a burly man. Kaga’s also in touch with Tomo’s brother, so… they’re really heaping on the developments in the eleventh hour… or maybe it’s more accurate to say "writing checks that the finale cannot hope to cash."

I like Touru and her Sephiroth-style ginormous sword, but it’s a shame she didn’t really do anything aside from holding Kaga at swordpoint to scare him off. Nobody else except Takatsuki really had a chance to do anything this episode though, and she barely lasted two seconds against the tentacle barrage… and even less time when attacked by the dildo. Unfortunately, she lost whatever coolness points she may have had by whining to Tomo about how he shouldn’t fight and then running off in a hissy fit when he did try to fight to save her. Misao picked up the slack by being her normal happy self in the middle of the depression, so at least Tomo remained cheerful. Come to think of it, he’s been remarkably free of self-doubt and angst for being as worthless as he is.

It really doesn’t look like anything but this Ignitor thing is going to be resolved next week though, since Kaga’s literally riding a plane full of, among cyborgs and Asura machines, fellow schoolmates and demanding the Ignitor in exchange for their lives. Hopefully they’ll at least wrap up the Takatsuki thing, although I have the sneaking dread that Misao’s going to end up eating that too and it’ll just end up being some deus ex machina cure for whatever’s up with Takatsuki.

Preview:

Terror on flight 789.