天下制覇

Why does this show put boobs on everything?

I definitely did not completely forget about this show this afternoon. Nor did I spend the afternoon playing Covenant of the Plume instead. I also did not sacrifice anybody to my almighty Mistress of the Underworld, Hel. No siree. Nope nope nope.

Impressions:

A completely by the numbers non-ending, wrapping up Ukyo’s stuff and featuring more pithy speeches from Yoichi about the importance of family than should be legally allowed. That didn’t stop me from grinning like a simpering idiot when Washizu and Tsubasa showed up to kicking music to fight off… butlers. Nor when the OP kicked in and Yoichi had his half-assed ultimate showdown with Ukyo. Funnily, the best animated portion of the entire episode was Tsubasa going berserk in her bondage getup on some random butlers. You go, girl.

Like I’ve been saying since week 3 or so… no conclusion expected, and none obtained… and that’s perfectly fine. The romance stuff was always fun to joke about, but I don’t think anybody ever really expected this to actually have any kind of conclusion. I’m not even sure one would have really worked since they really spent a lot of time painting themselves into a corner with Ayame and Washizu’s characterizations. At any rate, it was certainly a very fun and silly way to end the series, and in line with the other 92% of the series.

Ukyo lurks over Ibuki. She mumbles for her sisters… and Samurai, pissing off Ukyo.

The Scooby Gang shows up at the castle. Ayame wants Chihaya and Kagome to wait behind. Chihaya teases Ayame about just wanting to be alone with Yoichi. Kagome also protests, and Yoichi agrees that they should all go save Ibuki together. He blasts some poor tree into a makeshift raft.

Sakon watches them approach and reports it to Ukyo. He tells her that he’ll leave dealing with them to her and sends her off. She leaves, and greets the party at the entrance.

She calls out her squad of maids with uzis. The maids open fire, but Yoichi blocks the bullets. Sakon opens a poison dust vial and the maids blow it towards the group, but Yoichi blasts it back at them. Sakon tries to run, but Yoichi grabs her hand and demands to know why she’s doing this and breaking up the Ikaruga family. Sakon slaps Yoichi for his impudence and retreats.

The party next comes to a bridge where Sakon confronts them with her elite butler squad. Yoichi disposes of them, and the sisters use their own attacks to help out. However, the butler swarm is endless and Yoichi is distracted when Ayame gets attacked, letting them disarm him. As the butlers close in to finish Yoichi off, the yellow streak appears.

Washizu takes down a couple and Tsubasa follows suit. He’ll be the one to save Ibuki, not some idiot samurai. They keep fighting, with Angie joining them too. Washizu’s lackey throws his mace-hands to him, and then Yoichi notices how… uh… beautiful not-Torigaya looks. Tsubasa-vision also helps Washizu look super cool, but the butlers keep closing in.

Sakon pulls out a remote and detonates the bridge. Yoichi and the sisters escape to the near side, but the others are stuck. Washizu yells that he’ll leave saving Ibuki to them. They keep fighting off the butler swarm, but Angie knows that they’re not good enough with the uzi maids waiting in the wings. She strips Tsubasa and lets the killer instincts take over as Tsubasa goes to town on maid and butler alike.

Sakon disappears as the gang chases her. Chihaya stops them and explains that something’s up here.

Ukyo prepares to marry himself to Ibuki, remembering the past and his promise to become stronger to make her happy. Sakon shows up and tries to warn him that Yoichi et all are coming, but Ukyo yells are her for being worthless.

As he turns back to Ibuki, Yoichi shoots a wind blast between them. Ukyo tells him that there’s no way Yoichi could make him happy, and Yoichi concedes the point, but her happiness is with her family; with Chihaya, Ayame, and Kagome. The OP kicks in as an insert as the platform Ukyo and Ibuki are on rises to the roof. He yells down that he’ll leave it to Sakon.

Sakon dutifully stands to block them, but Yoichi asks her if this is really what a family should be like. She responds that it’s fine. However, Ayame points out that there are tears in her eyes. Sakon collapses, and pleads to Yoichi.

He once again shocks the sisters by leaping up after the ascending platform and chases Ukyo to the roof. He confronts Ukyo as he’s preparing a kite to retreat and demands that they settle this. Everything that led Ukyo up to this point flashes through his head and he accepts, cutting the kite free. He lets loose a wind blast the pushes Yoichi back.

Yoichi’s surprised, but pleased at Ukyo’s determination. This is a real fight where they will show their true spirits. Ukyo’s taken aback, but attacks again. Yoichi smiles and lets loose his blast, sending Ukyo flying. As he gets up, Yoichi happily tells him that it was marvelous. Ibuki seems to finally recognize Ukyo.

The sisters make it to the roof and Ibuki looks at them, but the roof shakes and Ibuki falls off.

Ukyo starts to jump after her, but Sakon grabs his leg and begs him to stay. Yoichi and the sisters leap after Ibuki, all grabbing onto Yoichi’s scarf as they fall. Yoichi creates a massive hurrican to let them down into the water as everybody else watches. Ukyo smiles down at Sakon and pats her head.

Yoichi still can’t swim, and grabs Ibuki’s floatation devices. She sends him flying, but he’s happy because she’s back. Kagome shyly shows the broken toy, and Ibuki promises that they’ll fix it together.

Then a final montage of all the characters in their lives and/or newly found delusions as Yoichi writes a letter to his father about everything that he’s learning here.

Final Thoughts:

Who is anybody kidding? This was braindead from start to finish, rather poorly produced, and occasionally totally shameless… and it was still one of the most charming shows of the season. The romantic elements of this were always secondary to the comic, and while last week’s episode was heavy on the drama, the rest of the show has been surfing ninjas, boob jokes, and combat maids. It was just a silly little show that filled a thirty minute gap in my Thursdays. That’s all it ever was, and expecting anything else is doing the show a disservice. The character development and romantic elements are just sidedishes, even if they were often more delicious than the main course.

I will say that it by and large did a spectacular job with characterization in certain places. Even the most abusive of the characters still had it in them to smile and forgive the others at the end of every episode. While Yoichi and Ibuki were about as cookie cutter as they come, Ayame and Washizu were both excellent. They had their issues, but we weren’t hammered over the head with them and they continued to function normally without crawling off to go sit sadly in the corner for entire episodes. There was no lasting forced drama, almost no lame angsting, and even if there was no story to speak of, at least those two were dynamic and grew more than characters in certain other shows I could name.

This show won’t be remembered long, nor do I think it really should be. It had a happy, charming, and likeable cast, and never did anything wrong or badly enough to make me regret sticking with it. Certainly not the most ringing endorsement I’ve ever given, but if you like things like this and you’ve got a couple hours to kill, you could certainly do far worse.