天下制覇

Evil Priestess Dogs Ineffectually Swarm Island. Seven dead. News at Eleven.

Another two parter. Lots of Machi again. Prett vapid episode, but the art was rather well done and consistent throughout, so no complaints. And the event that everybody who has been watching this show has been waiting for finally happens… a bridge building montage. That’s right. That’s what the show was lacking. Bridge building.

Suzu tells Ikuto more about the strange animals on the island, including learning jiu-jutsu from them somehow. More and more I think I’m realizing that poor Tonkatsu is the… ‘special’ animal of the island… and not in a good way.

Anyway, one of our warrior animals freaks out Ikuto who thinks it’s an evil bear, but it’s just a tiny two tailed cat, who is apparently one of Suzu’s teachers, and tells them about the survival games of the animals… which is apparently a martial arts competition. We get to learn about the various rulers of the island, the cat in the south, the bear in the east, and two other mystery ones. Just like Naruto, only with slightly more of a story…. and furry.

The cat asks Ikuto if he wants to participate in this particular competition as one of his warriors, and Ikuto, being the imbecile that he is, doesn’t realize that the first thing to do when someone asks for volunteers is to take a step backwards. It’s just basically paintball with sticks and aiming to draw moustaches though, so he thinks he’ll be fine.

They manage to get past exactly one other dog before Suzu decides it’s time for lunch. Then more dogs do party tricks and ninjutsu to distract them. Suzu’s walnut brain is confused by their incredible technique of running in a circle, and Ikuto foils them with his genius plan of putting something in their path. Ikuto’s taunted by the head dog, and charges forward, only for both to be tagged on the face by Ayane and Machi erupting from the earth.

Ayane faces off against Suzu and falls into her own trap while Machi tries to seduce Ikuto with some sexy sexy shoulderblade. Ikuto and Machi charge and Ikuto triumphs while at the same time, the dogs finish off the cat leader. Only it was actually Tonkatsu and the cat leaps out of the Tonkatsu with Ikuto and they win. When the real Tonkatsu shows up, Ikuto tries to take him apart, adding the short bus riders on the island to two.

Side B begins with Ikuto’s wet dream of waking up with Machi riding him. Maybe it’s a nightmare, who knows. The important part is that he’s in bed and wakes up with her on top of him. Perhaps the contact point is knees to chest, perhaps it’s something else… I’m not telling.

Ikuto saddles up his harem and the crew are off to go cherry blossom watching. They split up and Machi ends up with Ikuto and Tonkatsu on the edge of a cliff. Rin and Yukino think that there’s no way Machi would make a move on Ikuto while the one person with a clue suffers divine punishment from a Machi’s voodoo doll. Ayane, Suzu and for some reason Kuma-Kuma are the third group.

Machi tries to be very cute in order to get Ikuto to base jump and then just ties him up and throws him anyway. The three teams meet back up and are confronted by an old version of the cat from before which tells them where the island’s only sakura tree is. Then, because I was hoping and praying every day for the last month for a bridge building montage from this show, we get one.

Yeah, I’m sorry, I can’t go on any more. The bridge building montage was epic, magnificient, and truly a thing of genius and beauty. Every show should have one… no. Every show should have three.

It ends with something about finally reaching the tree and having a picnic. I forget. The bridge building montage though. Man. Hot shit.

I think I broke my brain with sarcasm.