Sirius the Jaeger #01 — Named Character Invulernability

July 12th, 2018

 

Boy, sure doesn't take much to make vampires explode into showers of jam.

The how not to summon thing began with the obligatory wake-up grope scene, but distinguished itself by lasting two minutes. The only action in the episode was an elf dude charging up an arrow for a minute straight, but the protagonist has protagonist powers, so he's immune, then ended with the elf girl straddling and humping him until he nipple-pinched her to orgasm. The horny caretaker show on the other hand, just had her take a bath with him again, but this time, in a bikini. Dare for greatness, Japan.

Impressions:

If the entire show was like the fight/chase in the last 2-3 minutes, I could absolutely get behind this show. The action was slick. The dialogue was mostly limited to corny remarks like "*gasp* You're the TITLE OF THE SHOW!?" The CGI cars were… still CGI. However, like most, if not all of PA Works things, it displays a steadfast dedication to focus its effort on being low-key melodramatic, dull, and badly written. Stick to the kind of bad writing where sometimes a single bullet makes vampires explode into a shower of viscera and sometimes dismemberment is just an annoyance because they had the "boss encounter" box checked. When I think "werewolves vs vampires," about the last thing I'm hoping for is a bunch of teenage ponces sitting around a table munching on cocktail sandwiches or the what I suspect is supposed to be comic relief Keystone Kops having a shout off about how inept they are. Okay, maybe the latter would be fine, at least if it didn't come on the heels of spending the last third of the episode putting me to sleep.

Kind of like every previous PA Works action show, really. I suppose it was light on the straight up exposition and internal narration (so far), but the middle thirteen or so minutes was a profoundly dull affair of characters shambling around waiting for something to happen. That's a lot of time to spend on basically nothing, especially in your opening episode and I would bet dollars to donuts that it was in service of attempting to introduce its fairly large cast despite only one of them doing jack squat in either the opening hook of the episode or the climax of it, so why were they chewing up all that scenery in the first place?

Next Episode:

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