天下制覇

RICE IS THE GREATEST THING EVER.

I just… really don't have it in me to suffer through a Puzzle and Dragons advertisement show today. Or ever. We'll all just have to judge that book by its cover and move on.

Impressions:

This bears all the same cardinal sins as NEW GAME, but instead of feigning humor by way of silly faces, it feigns sentimentality by having a child. All characters are perfect and doing their best. The most trivial banality of making rice is melodramatically overblown to be a bellwether of familial love and triumph over insecurities. All the while, the shrieking pixie child yells her love and heals the hearts of those around her, and her father stoically stares off into the distance, pained by the mental torture of not being able to make rice. At least they left that up to the audience to understand on their own from the probably close to five minutes of him looking constipated instead of self-narrating it.

Again, these are not characters I can feel anything for because they ridiculously idealized perfection. Their only flaw is caring too much and trying too hard. It is the emotional equivalent of candy floss, able to maybe provide a few good feelings for a moment, but that's only because it's wailing on the heartstrings through Yanni's Greatest Hits in the background and trotting out a child who heal's everyone's souls merely by being the miracle of being the kind of flawless child you see on maudlin Asian commercials about sacrificing everything for your kid. Seriously, why the hell are there so many of those? They're starting to creep me out.