天下制覇

Natsume’s Book of Friends 4
http://www.nasinc.co.jp/jp/natsume-anime/
Studio: Brains Base
Genre: Round Cats
Cast/Staff Information
Premieres January 2nd

Summary: 
Sequel sequel sequel series. Natsume’s continuing adventures trying to return the names to all the spirits in his book and give them their freedom.

Personal Thoughts:
I’ve successfully watched only two or three of the previous 40 or so episodes and I’d like to keep it that way, thank you very much. Even when I see people actually talking about this show, I have a hard time discerning what the draw exactly is. Same general staff as the last couple seasons, so no surprises or real changes expected there at all. Maybe if there was more eye-gouging… What doesn’t that make better?

Preseason Swing Rating: 
 
It’s glistening with what could be absolutely nothing.

The New Prince of Tennis
http://www.tv-tokyo.co.jp/anime/shin-tenipri/
Studio: Production IG
Genre: Sweaty Balls
Cast/Staff Information
Premieres January 4th

Summary: 
Sequel series. Ryoma is back in Japan after his trip to America to continue perfecting his tennis whose-its.

Personal Thoughts: 
Aaand I’m ‘behind’ approximately 200 episodes on this one. Oh yeah, it’s also Jump, and you know how I absolutely adore everything that they spew out. It is a completely new studio and staff from the old one, but then again, it’s IG. I doubt they’ll be putting their own ‘special’ touch on it though, so that just leaves it as the endless cavalcade of tennis plus "believe in yourself/the heart of the cards/felt balls" without even the miniskirts of women’s tennis to liven up the sport.

Preseason Swing Rating: 
   
Has both the excitement and staying power of bran.

Detective Opera Milky Holmes 2
http://milky-holmes.com/
Studio: JC Staff
Genre: Comedy
Cast/Staff Information
Premieres January 5th

Summary: 
The continuining advetures of a group of less-than-successful detectives ‘solving’ crimes and fighting against phantom thieves while trying to regain their lost magical powers.

Personal Thoughts: 
While I won’t say that the first season was perfect, it was definitely one of my favorite comedies in a long while. Delightfully energetic and offkilter, only rarely trying to flirt with sense while the girls were ravenously devouring giant squid. The same staff’s working on it again, so I hope they don’t even bother with all the angstiness and attempts to be serious and just get right into the wacky comedy and Twenty’s Twentiness from the start. The CM has his nipples spinning like fanblades, so yeah, I’m looking forward to it.

Preseason Swing Rating: 

A worse crime-solving team than the KISS Pigs^tm.

Kill Me, Baby!
http://www.tbs.co.jp/anime/kmb/
Studio: JC Staff
Genre: Comedy
Cast/Staff Information
Premieres January 5th

Summary: 
Sonya is a trained and active assassin. She’s also attending regular school and has a very difficult time differentiating between the two areas. Her assassin training kicks in every time her clueless but incorrigible friend Yasuna tries to play with her.

Personal Thoughts: 
While pure comedies are one thing JC Staff has consistently done very well with (one of the few things…) and energetic slapstick is always welcome in the anime world of angst, slow pans, and repeating the joke to make sure everybody understood it, the staff here really doesn’t inspire confidence. The director’s basically a newbie with only Hatsukoi Limited (ugh) under his belt and the head writer is the genius behind Merry and Aria TSA. Who knows, maybe if they just give up trying to make sense, they can produce something that’s actually intentionally funny instead of having invisible trombones during the moment of climax. The PVs are also a tad bit… undermade, using that same style as they did in Hatsukoi Limited where they only bothered to draw about a third of the screen in half the shots. So yeah… can’t say I’ve got too many hopes for this one.

Preseason Swing Rating: 
     
Let the swarms of comedies past fly.

Amagami SS+ Plus
http://www.tbs.co.jp/anime/amagami/
Studio: AIC
Genre: Phone Sex Ad
Cast/Staff Information
Premieres January 5th

Summary: 
Sequel series. Junichi always gets depressed around Christmas and ends up spending the romantic holiday alone. However, it’s his last year of high school and this year, he’s not satisfied to spend it by himself. Except at this point he’s already won all the girls in their own individual timelines.

Personal Thoughts: 
And the awards for both the Most Redunant Title and Premise Most Likely To Be Mistaken For a Phone Sex Ad. "Lonely? Hot singles in your area eager for action are just waiting to talk to you!" This’ll be also following the same omnibus format of the original and resetting itself after every other episode to focus on each girl in turn, all in their own separate timelines like the show’s trying to be Quantum Leap. Between Milky Holmes and Guilty Crown, Thursdays are already stupid enough. I barely even managed to stay awake through the first episode of the first season anyway.

Preseason Swing Rating: 
  
DVDs will come with complimentary tissues for easier enjoyment.

High School DxD
http://www.haremking.tv/
Studio: TNK
Genre: Action
Cast/Staff Information
Premieres January 5th (Evening)

Summary: 
Hyoudou’s an incorrigible pervert but somehow finally manages to get a date. When he shows up, he’s killed by a mysterious girl. He awakens with new devilish power and begins to learn that many of the people around him are devils, angels, and all manner of preternatural creatures and is thrust into the middle of a violent power struggle.

Personal Thoughts: 
Well, it’s an evening show, so that means that I’m usually already been sedated by food and willing to plop myself down in front of just about anything. It seems okay, I guess, at least as far as Yet Another ‘Fighting’ Harem shows go. Given the PVs, I can’t imagine it becoming anything more than that. The staff is ‘solid’ too, or at least has a copious amount of experience with this kind of show, from Ikki Tousen to Demon King in the Back Row. TNK themselves are probably the weakest link in the chain, as they really don’t do much on their own and rarely better than average production. Of course, this chain is forged on little more than T&A, so it’s not like expectations are particularly high to begin with.

Preseason Swing Rating: 
   
Mara’s pick of the season.

War Maiden Epic: Symphogear
http://www.symphogear.com/
Studio: Encourage Films
Genre: Action
Cast/Staff Information
Premieres January 6th

Summary: 
Mysterious monsters have begun appearing in the world that humans call Noise. Tsubasa and Kanade are a pair of idols who fight against them as the idol pair Zwei Wing, but Tsubasa freezes during a fight and Kanade gives her life to protect her. Tsubasa has to carry on the fight against the Noise with her new friends, never forgetting Kanade’s last words to her.

Personal Thoughts: 
The first episode was screened earlier ‘today’ (well, the 26th in Japan) and reactions to it have been hilarious to read. Mainly because few people were expecting a supposedly main character to die about 10 minutes into the first episode. Unfortunately, most of the other impressions seem to be "Haha, this is bad, but lesbians!" Not that I put much stock in any Non-Aroduc, but it’s not really something you want to hear. Well, aside from wanton violence. Still, with no marketing and the summary on their website apparently around 50% a lie, one has to wonder if they have any idea what they’re doing. Then again, it did work out pretty well for Ga-Rei Zero.

Preseason Swing Rating: 
       
Let us dance the dance of idols…

The Knight in the Area
http://www.tv-asahi.co.jp/knight/
Studio: Shin-ei Animation
Genre: Drama
Cast/Staff Information
Premieres January 6th (evening)

Summary: 
Kakeru thinks he’s useless at soccer and his brother Suguru got all the talent. Suguru disagrees, but Kakeru’s life is thrown into chaos when they’re in a severe car accident. Suguru dies and Kakeru needs a heart transplant to save his life. He receives Suguru’s heart and takes over his dream to reach the national championships.

Personal Thoughts:
…What. I’m not sure if that sounds more like a supervillain backstory, or a plot twist of Twilight. Well, I suppose it could be both, Metal Gear Solid. When you’re taking "My dead brother’s heart lives on… inside me" and your twist on it is to make that statement literally true… well… we’re not exactly starting at the pinnacle of great writing here. Angsty sports dramas aren’t my thing anyway. It’s also being done by Shin-ei, whose finest piece of animation to date may very well be Shin-chan. It is soccer, though. How hard can it be to animate a 0-0 tie? Take that, rest of the world.

Preseason Swing Rating: 

Would be more promising if it was a stolen kidney granting super powers.

Zero’s Familiar F
http://www.zero-tsukaima.com/
Studio: JC Staff
Genre: Adventure
Cast/Staff Information
Premieres January 6th (Evening)

Summary: 
Sequel sequel sequel series. Saito is accidentally summoned to a world of magic by a mage who can only blow things up and is drawn into the struggle of the bourgeoisie against the proletariet. Also elves or something.

Personal Thoughts: 
Yet another evening show, and yes, it airs on the same day as Shana. I think it’s part of JC Staff’s insidious plan to drive everybody mad with Rie’s harpy-like shrieking. I actually do think this will be significantly better than the last couple seasons though. The director from season 1 is back in charge of it and the original creator is handling the writing himself this time around instead of one of JC Staff’s trained monkeys. Will it be good though? No, probably still not. But aside from Rie’s ear-piercing whine, likely a suitable way to pass Friday evenings.

Preseason Swing Rating: 

Two melonbr… wait, wrong show.

Bodacious Space Pirates
http://www.starchild.co.jp/special/mo-retsu/
Studio: Satelight
Genre: Adventure
Cast/Staff Information
Premieres January 7th

Summary: 
Marika leads a relatively normal space life in space school when one day, her dead father’s crew shows up and tells her that to keep their writ allowing them to be privateers, their new captain has to be a direct descendant of their old captain. Now she has to split her life between being both a regular high school girl and being captain of a space pirate ship.

Personal Thoughts: 
Damn it. Who taught the Japanese the word "bodacious?" Is it 1980 again? Why am I not full of cocaine then? Ahem. I’m not really sure what to make of this actually. Despite the title and 90% female cast, there wasn’t really any T&A in the PVs besides a couple shots from between the legs in cockpits which are required by law for all female pilots in Japan. I guess Marika working in a maid cafe could count, but again, that confuses me more than leads to any sort of cohesive expectations. Can’t say that I’m excited about all the CG spaceships lazily drifting around space though. Satelight and this director have done plenty of garbage as well as some better stuff too so… really who knows?

Preseason Swing Rating: 
       
More tubular and whack than 5 neon lava lamps.

Brave 10
http://www.brave10.com/
Studio: Studio Sakimakura
Genre: Action
Cast/Staff Information
Premieres January 7th

Summary: 
Saizou is a wandering ninja without a master. He joins with a priestess on his way to meet Sanada Yukimura, who is putting together a team of ten warriors to be an unrivaled force that nobody can stand again.

Personal Thoughts: 
Another hard one to predict. Sakimakura has only done Cardfight Vanguard (oi), while both the director and writer are longtime vets with tons of decent and not-so-decent things under their belts. The promos look fairly average as well. I’d hope that’s not the best of the fights in the show, but I have the sinking sensation that they probably are. They’ve also replaced members of the Sanada Braves (which was an actual group) with penis-hungry women to be draped over Saizou as he blushes and squirms awkwardly from ovaries being within 20 feet of him so… also not really a great sign.

Preseason Swing Rating: 

"My name is Nobushige, you dicks."

Nisemonogatari 
http://www.nisemonogatari-anime.com/
Studio: Shaft
Genre: Talking
Cast/Staff Information
Premieres January 7th

Summary: 
Sequel series. Ex-vampire Araragi continues solving the various supernatural problems afflicting the women around him.

Personal Thoughts: 
I lasted until the episode that was approximately 15 minutes of stills and pans before giving up on the first season and really have little interest in being a part of this one either. Yeah, I’m sure I’ll miss out on people having spaghetti shooting out of their heads, minute upon minute of shots of a CG jungle gym, panty shots, and "THIS ARTWORK WASN’T FINISHED IN TIME" cards, but I’ll find some way to bravely carry on. I’ll have to find the strength somewhere.

Preseason Swing Rating: 
  
%#%@*%#@%#%*&@#*%#!!

Aquarion Evol
http://aqevol.com/
Studio: 8 Bit/Satelight
Genre: Action
Cast/Staff Information
Premieres January 8th (Two episode broadcast)

Summary: 
12,000 years after the events of the first Aquarion, invaders from another dimension begin to appear. It’s up to a new set of heroes, carrying on the reincarnated souls of the first series heroes (who were carrying the reincarnated souls of previous heroes…) and new Aquarion mecha to save humanity.

Personal Thoughts: 
Same director as the original Aquarion, but with a new writer, the master who was behind such masterpieces like Canaan, Gosick, Fractale, and Hanasaku Iroha. So let me guess… a strong start that fizzles about 2 episodes in, goes nowhere… continues to go nowhere… and then ends. I haven’t watched the original anyway and there’s no love lost between me and all the angsty and nonsensical core cliches that combine like brain-damaged robotic lions to form the mighty Mechagenre (also Godzilla’s fiercest foe), so I personally don’t have much interest. Fans of the original will probably like the first few episodes until Okada’s writing ‘talent’ kicks in.

Preseason Swing Rating: 
 
Mechataiyaki, roll out.

LAGRANGE
http://lag-rin.com/
Studio: Xebec
Genre: Action
Cast/Staff Information
Premieres January 8th

Summary: 
Madoka’s a normal girl with a healthy interest in sports. One day, she sees a girl drowning while on her way to school. She saves the girl and in return, the girl brings her to a high-tech facility which comes under attack. Madoka is forced into the pilot seat of a mech to protect them all.

Personal Thoughts: 
This show already has a Japanese title, an English subtitle, an official English localized title, and a subtitle to that. Frankly, I don’t even care what it’s called anymore. The first episode also had a pre-airing special on Nico-Nico’s live channel on December 24th. Nobody recorded it though, and I pay little to no attention to ongoing events, so… *shrug* What I’ve read from impressions though makes it seem average at best. Xebec has handled plenty of sci-fi in the past before they took over the business of churning out T&A and this has their old Stellvia/Nadesico director handling it. Their stock has been rising lately too, although this shares none of the usual staff members associated with their comedies. Again though, mecha really isn’t my thing, even with heavy lesbian overtones whilst fighting against the evil invading men. It is on a slow day though and the promos were about 60% shots of asses, crotches, or girls stripping. Silly Xebec.

Preseason Swing Rating: 

"Just let my penis soothe what ails you, ladies."

I’ll Wait For That Summer
http://www.ichika-ichika.com/
Studio: JC Staff
Genre: Romance
Cast/Staff Information
Premieres January 9th

Summary: 
A nostalgic love story of three girls modeled like an old folklore.

Personal Thoughts: 
Yeah, this is completely original and JC Staff is never good about putting out any kind of marketing, even for their high profile shows. If you’re keeping count, this is also the SIXTH JC Staff show that’ll be airing this season. SIXTH. The director is pretty awful though (Railgun, Xenoglossia, H&C2) and the head writer’s not too much better. The single commercial didn’t really show anything all that exciting either. So basically, there’s not really much of anything known about the show so far and what is known doesn’t look good. Stellar.

Preseason Swing Rating: 
                  
Nice, uh… scenery?

Daily Lives of High School Boys
http://www.danshinichijyo.net/
Studio: Sunrise
Genre: Comedy
Cast/Staff Information
Premieres January 9th

Summary: 
The comic adventures of three less-than-intelligent boys going to an all-boys school and getting into all manner of trouble .

Personal Thoughts: 
They’ve been releasing ~4 minute shorts for awhile now and I barely managed to stay awake through them. Thankfully, I could get up and make myself lunch while missing absolutely nothing. There was literally nearly five minutes on "That girl has a mole… but I can’t work up the courage to tell her." If the actual show is anything like them, it’s going to be an under-produced collection of empty space. There’s about 30 minutes of those shorts but if you remove all the blank space of slow pans and people staring, it only amounts to about 4 minutes of content. So yeah, if the goal was to be funny, then they’re going to need to work a hell of a lot harder than that. Maybe by averaging more than one joke every other minute. Or at least toss up a little eyecandy. Even Deen’s regular boytoy shows at least have some manner of substance.

Preseason Swing Rating: 
  
Down with gender equality!

Another
http://www.another-anime.jp/
Studio: PA Works
Genre: Thriller
Cast/Staff Information
Premieres January 10th

Summary: 
After spending a month in the hospital because of illness, Kouichi transfers into a new school. Things immediately feel wrong to him though. He finds himself drawn to a mysterious girl who keeps to herself and learns that something terrible happened in the past that nobody dares talk about. Then one of his classmates dies a brutal death and the mysteries of his new school only deepen… 

Personal Thoughts: 
Another bit of an odd duck. The director’s been around for a long time and done a number of things, but mostly comedies and Blood-C is the most recent thing he’s done. The writer’s a complete newbie, and PA Works is… well… PA Works. Solid production at the start that quickly peters out. Getting a new writer and director will probably help them a bit there, but still… The PVs were all practically nothing but close-ups of people looking surprised too… at least when they weren’t just zooming in on eyes. If that was the best they could do to try to hook people in on a thriller/mystery show, I doubt the show itself will be much better. 

Preseason Swing Rating: 

THE SPHINX HAS SPOKEN.

Listen to What Papa Says!
http://www.starchild.co.jp/special/papakiki/
Studio: Feel
Genre: Comedy
Cast/Staff Information 
Premieres January 10th

Summary: 
Yuta’s just a regular freshman at college. His parents died when he was young and his older sister got married to a middle-aged man years ago. One day, the plane his sister and her husband is on mysteriously disappears, so he has to take custody of their three daughters in his tiny apartment so the family doesn’t get split up while still surviving his college life.

Personal Thoughts: 
And here’s Feel, with their usual Feel thing, making what is basically Japanese Sons of Tucson with quasi-incest vibes between step-cousins. On the other hand, this is Zexcs’s main director and a writer that has done almost nothing but little kid’s shows and Yosuga Sora. Try parsing out what the hell that adds up to. I dare you. The best thing it has going for it is that Monday through Wednesday are looking like a vast wasteland of absolutely nothing at all. Who knows, maybe Zexcs can act as a good influence on Feel, but since the promos involve the girls rubbing their breasts on him and/or him falling and groping them… well… let’s just leave it at "Monday through Wednesday looks awful." 

Preseason Swing Rating: 

Imprinting apparently happens within seconds.

Dog x Me SS
http://www.inuboku.tv/
Studio: David Production
Genre: Comedy
Cast/Staff Information
Premieres January 12th

Summary:
Ririchiyo is part of a prestigious magical family and has always hated that her own will and how she’s seen is always overshadowed by her family. They agree to let her move out if she lives at a hotel for half-demons which requires every guest to be accompanied by a secret service agent to protect them. Ririchiyo tries to reject hers, but then learns that it’s a fox spirit that she has met before in the past. He begs to be allowed to stay at her side, even if it’s just as her dog.

Personal Thoughts: 
The title’s actually written as "Fox" and pronounced as dog so… Japanese. David’s track record is pretty poor and the staff here is pretty new as well. Then there’s the promos, which are more cherry blossoms than characters, and almost nobody actually moving. So yeah, you could say that I have my doubts as to whether or not this will be worth watching. It airs on Thursdays too, which already look packed.

Preseason Swing Rating: 
  
Invulnerable demonic dogs

Black Rock Shooter
http://www.noitamina-brs.jp/
Studio: Ordet
Genre: Drama
Cast/Staff Information
Premieres February 2nd

Summary: 
Continuation of the OVA. Kuroi had to merge with the mysterious Black Rock Shooter in the otherworld to save her friend from an evil creature that was possessing her. However, the battle and the mystery isn’t over yet.

Personal Thoughts: 
The OVA as a massive disappointment, consisting of only about 10% of the action that every single promo showed, and the only real change to the staff here was to add in Okada as the lead writer. I believe I’ve already mentioned my admiration for her past set of works. At least expectations are sufficiently low. The Otherworld stuff was nicely done and stylish, but if they keep to the same split as the OVA did, that’ll be only about 60 seconds of every episode and dull, empty nothing for all the rest.

Preseason Swing Rating: 

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Smile Precure!
http://www.asahi.co.jp/precure/
Studio: Toei Animation
Genre: Cellphones and Cellphone Accessories
Cast/Staff Information
Premieres February 5th

Summary: 
Miyuki’s late to school when she finds a fairytale book. A strange animal jumps out of it and begs her to become a Pretty Cure warrior in order to save Fairy Tale Land from the Bad End Kingdom who are trying to stop everyone from having a happily ever after ending.

Personal Thoughts: 
It made my brain ache just writing that. It’s just the yearly reboot of PreCure with new animals, new girls, new cellphone toys, new dolls, etc. All the things that they need to sell to little girls. It’s still probably going to be better produced than it has any right to be, but I cannot imagine it being significantly different from any of the ten or so previous PreCures. I’m just mad that they didn’t use my idea for Suite PreCure’s sequel, Suite and Soirée PreCure. Jerks.

Preseason Swing Rating: 
   
Tickle Me PreCure to air in 2013.